500 words challenge, Writing

{Day 2} Is personal blogging cloning self-centered earthlings?

Everybody has his or her own dreams they hold dear to their heart. The mere mental slideshowof those desires bring a smile on their faces — an obscure one, a sinister one, a happy one. Desires ought to bring a certain pleasure to the thought owner and they are not limited on the good side of the shelf. Desires seduces and are believed to tag along happiness to ones self and not necessarily to others. It’s a little selfish, I know. 

My religious perception of desire was bugging me while I was attending mass earlier. I inhaled the Catholic scent of St. Augustine’s Church in Limerick, while my ears were struggling to avoid silence by magnifying even the faintest sound my floral boots make on the tiled floor. I came inside thinking how selfish I have been for most days, or for all of my life. I always think about my goals, my family, my boyfriend, my friends, my job and my financial security that I just started to build. Thanks to the internet and my personal blogging, I have never been this “lustful for life”. I have never been more empowered than me creating life lists and crossing out things that I’ve done and filling in new ones again.

I’d have this moments when I virtually fast track to the end part of my life, pretending to have reached all of the desires of my heart. At the end of my journey, I would ask myself, “What now? Are you happy that you have published one book? Are you happy you have two lovely children with curly hair, big eyes and fair complexion? Are you happy with the financial kingdom that  you have started for your bloodline?” What will happen to all of my earthly desires when I leave the soils of the earth?

Sometimes, I feel guilty for eating a lot when a lot of the people go hungry. I feel guilty when I go buy things for myself and I cannot give a portion of my income to the needy. I feel guilty of just planning out the happy life ahead of me when girls get raped everyday over and over again on different parts of the world.

I don’t know what difference I could do or what charitable organization I could join. I don’t know where to put my efforts on — me enjoying the world built by our Creator and helping my family or sacrificing a little to help the needy. I feel like Barbie most of the time — nurturing my compassionate self sparing a moment for the cruelties of the earth, but giving in to my inner material girl who just wants to have fun.

I know I don’t need to absorb all the negatives in this world, but sometimes, I feel like a sponge — easy to soak in those emotions, easy to squeeze them off. Squish, squish. Just like that.

So, tell me should I feel guilty for blogging out my dreams and the life that I want to live? Should I feel embarrassed for spending too much time on my personal blog and skipping out the news section? How could I give out to the world? How could I change the life of one miserable soul? How could I help all those who need me? Starting with my family is acceptable, but I think it is still selfish enough.

Sometimes, the conflicts posed by heaven and earth are just too hard to fathom.

Advertisements
Standard
500 words challenge, Writing

{Day 1} The Write Commitment

Define writing. 

— something I love

Define commitment.

— something I sort of loathe

Define ‘The Write Commitment’

— something far too lovely for me to loathe

So by now, you probably have an idea on how I feel about this challenge. Just like every other people. On challenges. I would do things that I hate so that I could achieve something that I want or I desire or love. In my case, it’s just clashing responsibilities and priorities which make me kind of I’ll-comply-though-I’m-tired attitude with this Write Commitment. I mean, I absolutely love free writing, but hey I have a day job and some creative writing sidelines which I need to have a second stream of income.

So, why have I signed up for the 500 words challenge?

Sometimes, I just want to write for myself. On my personal blog. On this blog, my literary poop tub. And our finance blog. And my online portfolio, but I think I just can’t. So maybe this is why I’ve joined the 500 words bandwagon. To help me help myself. To help me do the things that I love. Or maybe I am just taking much more things that I can actually can, but hey, I love to be able to do things that I love. 

Do I swear, really really swear to finish the 500 words challenge?

Yes, I do! Really, really do. As my co-internet-frenzy writer friend told me, I should do some CPR on my blogs. Because I want my writing to be heard. And talked about. And linked to. You know, that kind of stuff. And, besides, Jeff says I could skip a day. (Oh, so me, procrastinating eve before starting!) So, if I stick to my Write Commitment, I am about to through 31 days of pure writing. That would be a total bliss. Not to mention, productive.

Am I willing to be hard on myself and have expectations?

I’ll say yes. I have been missing my writing days so yes, I am going to encourage myself to go write everyday. Before I go to the shower. Before I sleep. Any time just as long as I am alone. I am usually pesky when someone talks to me while I am writing. My boyfriend can attest to that.

Yep, so back to my expectations. Here it goes:

Myself, I expect time-worthy blog pieces on your personal blog, literary blog, finance blog and the Finance Pinoy blog. I also expect you to make this time as a chance to go find prospects on which sites to write for. Take the plunge. Make it bigger. Online-preneurs have been coming to you without you reaching out to them first. I believe you could take heaps more if you begin to reach out to them. And most especially, I expect you to write helpful posts. Those that your readers will find inspiration from, find technical help from, gain financial wisdom from, and most especially, anchor God’s surprising love from. I know you have your tone and voice of writing developed by now. But, I know you could do so much much more. Build a blog that captures, darling.

Standard
for Magpie Tales, Writing

Magpie Mondays: Let Fear Not Be

painting by Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec

 

She knows no one in the bar; she just wanted to do something radical

and so, she danced with no music as if there was

and smiled to people staring as if she knew them.

Pretty soon, the band started playing offbeat melodies

and the crowd marched for the dance floor to join her.

— for life wasn’t given to us just so we could breathe. We were destined to live boldly.

 

She was created when the universe exploded and hence,

star dust must be in her bones.

She allows her star to shine its brightest white.

Her starlight beams upon me

Her stars dangles with mine.

— She is me, and I, her.

Standard
for Magpie Tales, Prose Poetry, Writing

Magpie Mondays: Dream Balloons and Lane-Free Pathways

Apprehensions, move out of the way.

Fear, you can wait, but you can only in vain.

Because I’ll be driving on a lane-free path today.

Discernment has gotten the better of me.

In my boat shoes, I would fly over the waters.

Because I’ll be driving on a lane-free path today.

I’ll kiss all my doubts goodbye out of my car window,

as the image of my comfort zone shrinks on my rear-view mirror

Because I’ll be driving on a lane-free path today.

** Written for The Magpie Tales

Standard